Chronicle 006: Solemnization on the same day or separate day?

During the preparation of the wedding, I find that even the closest couples will quarrel. There are so so so so many details to agree on, to execute and finalize. One subject of contention was whether we should have our solemnization (aka ROM) on the same day as our wedding.

After speaking to the photographers, I was familiar with their charges whether it was per hour, per event etc. The solemnization package was usually bundled as a 3h event, and so is your big day wedding dinner. The rates are nearly the same. With that in mind, we agreed that it was better that we say our vows right before the dinner. We will not have to worry about our clothes and make-up as well.

However, I’ve heard many stories about how tiring it is to squeeze everything together in one day. I didn’t really believe it until I participated in my close friend’s wedding. I was at her house the day before preparing the gate crashing games and stayed till she finished her “combing of hair” ceremony. By the time I got home, showered and packed for the next day, it was 2am. I reached her place around 615am in the morning and she was midway into her hair and make-up. The groom was due to arrive around 730 but they were delayed due to a punctured tyre! We waited till 9am and they finally arrived (from Jurong to Tampines). The games were set in motion and we had a ball of fun. Then, we set off for the tea ceremony at the groom’s side. By the time we return for the ceremony on the bride’s side, it was 1pm. I left her house for a short snooze by 2pm and went off to the hair dresser’s at 4pm. As she had asked me to be one of her hosts, I had to be at the hotel by 530pm, go through the dry runs, rehearsed the script with the other host (whom luckily is a mutual friend). The girls helped around the reception table, and at the end helped to pack up as well. We all felt proud that we were able to share the joy and stress of our good friend.

You would realize by now that her wedding did not even include the solemnization. When we talked about the wedding, she said that it went by rather quickly and that’s about it. But my dear friend was smart, she did her solemnization way before the actual day.

On a separate occasion, I attended the solemnization of another good friend at a restaurant in the park. It was just the exchanging of the vows, a short speech and that’s all! We talked and laughed with the bride and took many pictures. That made it a memorable wedding for me.

And so we fought over this.

At the end, we decided that we will have it separately with a managed budget. There’s no right or wrong in this decision, and I was relieved that we both agreed on it at the end.

Hope to be able to decor my venue as well as this!

image credit


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